How to Live and Date with Herpes
❤️ Click here: Dating with genital hsv 1
However, I imagine a survey of the general population would swing the other way just a bit ; Thanks again. I explained that I had herpes, and that was why I was being so cautious. Right Online Eventually, I met a man online who lived only three miles from me.
I've been seeing a new girl recently. I do not regret spending a year of my life with him or for getting with him in the first place. When I found out, I thought my world was over.
Herpes Singles Dating - Funny, because we both know kissing me has a similar, if not significantly greater exposure chance if only because, unless she's in porn star training, I'll spend more time kissing her than going down on her , but we don't discuss it, and she has no hesitation with a kiss. Symptoms may include a fever, headache, and muscle aches for a few weeks.
The mechanics of hsv-1 transmition have been well covered. I'm really looking for good advice on how to deal with an oral hsv-1 infection and dating. I know several people who have had cold sores, and occasionally get recurrences, yet don't really consider that much when dating, hooking up, etc. The attitude is generally not to worry about it unless there's an outbreak, then don't have any physical contact till the outbreak is over. This is also the rule I used to live by. However, the more I've learned about hsv-1 and the possibility of infection, particularly related to oral sex, has led to a change in approach. Anyway, first girl, this went fine, as she'd had cold sores in her younger days. I've been seeing a new girl recently. Brought up the issue with her. This time we have a problem. No oral sex, and she's a little freaked out in general. Of course, most doctors don't test for hsv-1 infection. I pointed that out. I also pointed out that there's a better chance that she has been exposed than not. I also suggested that if its really on her mind, that she get tested to be sure. Quesions: Q1 Why is a test for hsv-1 generally not given unless requested or am I wrong about that? Q2 If the hsv-1 status of a partner is not known, is complete oral sex abstinance the suggested course? I've never, ever heard of anybody actually using one. So, I feel like I'm a little trapped. I can't in good conscience engage in oral sex with a girl unless we establish hsv-1 status, because even though its unlikely to be passed with no symptoms present, its FAR from impossible. However, even though many, if not most, sexually active people have about the same level of risk as I do, few bring it up. Here's my general plan going forward, plus some quesions mixed in: - Ask hsv-1 status - If known positive, we're ok can't transmit to genital area if already postive oral, correct? Q3 - If unknown, suggest test and wait for results what test? Q4 - If known negative, no oral, or just avoid when outbreak suspected? Lets say I was going to marry a hsv-1 neg girl. Would intentional oral transmition make sense? Q6 The idea is that, its highly likely that she'll be infected eventually. The basic dilemma is that there really isn't all that much research on acquistion of oral-genital HSV-1 infection. Almost nothing is known about most of the factors that may raise or lower the risk in any particular case, such as: a how long the orally infected person has had HSV-1, and therefore the infected person's age it's a fair bet that teens might be more likely to transmit HSV-1 than older persons, but no data exist ; b whether the infected person has symptoms of oral herpes, how frequently, and how recently; c whether or not the infected person has had a cold or other illness that could reactivate HSV-1; d details of the sexual exposure; and on it goes. Actually, they are being done increasingly as a routine when people have HSV testing. But what to do with the results? Most people would say no. About 50% of people are HSV-1 positive. Let's say 10% of them have been tested and know it. Now 5% of the population knows they have HSV-1. Those people tell their partners. The other 45% of the infected population 90% of those with HSV-1 don't know it and have nothing to tell their partners. On balance, how much safer is the exposed person? Really no safer at all. Asking about symptoms doesn't help much. The likelihood of someone having oral herpes probalby is almost as high in someone who says they don't have it as in those who say they have had cold sores. Equally important, many people who say they have had oral herpes in fact have not. Unless there has been a professional diagnosis which is uncommon , a history of past oral herpes often is very unrelaible. For example, many people think their childhood canker sores were herpes. I would not recomend anybody intentionlly acquire any HSV infection, whether type 1 or 2. Although serious complications are rare, they do occur; every year a number of people die of HSV infections or their complications, or are permanently disabled. Also, if I knew I was likely to catch HSV-1, I would prefer genital over oral. Fewer recurrences, less likelihood of transmission to other persons. Despite those rare complications, you seem to have an atypical level of concern about genital herpes in general and HSV-1 in particular. Personally, if I were younger and dating again, or if I were about to marry, I would ask partners about genital herpes and other STDs; would use condoms for vaginal sex outside a committed relationship; and wouldn't permit oral sex if my partner had an obvious cold sore. Once in a committed relationship, I would stop taking any of those measures, except maybe if I knew my partner had genital HSV-2 infection. I had something strange show up, and I went to the doctor, and he told me its herpes! I haven't been with anybody else in a long time. Why didn't you tell me you had herpes? I get small cold sores like once or twice a year. I don't have genital herpes, though. Well my doctor said you can get genital herpes from that, but most people don't realize that. You know what I mean? My genital herpes concern doesn't really stem from a worry about my own health. Its the possibility of the above, and just the general possibility of giving it to somebody. It doesn't help that a friend had a related experience. He was dating a girl, and she had her initial hsv-1 oral outbreak. She seriously freaked out. It sort of put the issue into my mind. I agree with 1, which is the essense of the dillema I've created for myself. Lets take the girl I've been seeing recently, and a piece of our conversation. How much less safe is she with me than another guy? I'm tired, so lets just say a few percent. In general, however, no serious difference. But I seriously doubt she'd be interested in engaging in any sort of oral sex from my end. Funny, because we both know kissing me has a similar, if not significantly greater exposure chance if only because, unless she's in porn star training, I'll spend more time kissing her than going down on her , but we don't discuss it, and she has no hesitation with a kiss. So, I worry about being the cause of the distress a case of genital hsv-1 would cause. So, I bring it up. And in doing so, I've accomplished little other than freaking her out. But, I greatly appreciate you response and will take it to heart. I am surprised about the level of research on the topic. I think from a medical perspective, genital herpes isn't a big deal. Compare that with HIV, and not to metion everything outside of the STD range cancer, heart disease, etc , and its kind of silly to get all worked up about it. If you could get it on your lip or your arm, we wouldn't be having this web discussion. Its the fact that you can get it on your lip and your genitals yeah, I know, also on your finger or in your eye and possibly progress to your brain, but for the most part, lips and naughty bits. I understand why you would have this opinion, and logically I agree with you. However, I imagine a survey of the general population would swing the other way just a bit ; Thanks again. HHH, Thanks for always taking time to answer our questions. I hope this isn't considered thread hopping since it's for a little more information regarding one of your comments. I did not find any information on the forum regarding serious herpes complications. Although serious complications are rare, they do occur; every year a number of people die of HSV infections or their complications, or are permanently disabled. Also, does daily suppressive therapy help to prevent any serious complications from developing? Do more serious herpes complications arise with individuals whose bodies are not healthy? Lastly, can the hsv1 and 2 virus strains develop antibody resistant strains if a person takes daily suppressive therapy? You have been very helpful in the past and I appreciate your insight to learning as much as I can about this condition affecting myself and so many others. Although serious complications are rare, they do occur; every year a number of people die of HSV infections or their complications, or are permanently disabled. Do they apply to HSV-1 and HSV-2? Hi mrmjones, I know I'm a little late getting into this thread. I hadn't been infected yet at the time of the postings. Looks like on July 18th I was infected with HSV, which since has been confirmed you can read my question from July 29 -- Herpes Exposure Timeline. I don't know the type. My doctor says the test I had done a culture doesn't test for type. If I want that done it will have to be paid for out of pocket. I am really glad you asked all the questions you did because I am trying to learn as much as I can about this and what lies ahead for me. However, I am still totally confused. I guess until I find out the type, I won't be able to get all of my questions answered. He is in complete denial and, frankly, I want to know what else he might have that he didn't tell me about. Once I know that, I can relax a bit I hope! Regards, c-biskit The Content on this Site is presented in a summary fashion, and is intended to be used for educational and entertainment purposes only. It is not intended to be and should not be interpreted as medical advice or a diagnosis of any health or fitness problem, condition or disease; or a recommendation for a specific test, doctor, care provider, procedure, treatment plan, product, or course of action. Never disregard the medical advice of your physician or health professional, or delay in seeking such advice, because of something you read on this Site. 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Herpes Type 1
Now 5% of the population knows they have HSV-1. I did not go looking for a new partner. Fewer recurrences, less likelihood of prime to other persons. I cried daily and was depressed for months. My doctor says the test I had done a culture doesn't test for type. Watch: 7 Condom Myths Debunked For Your Protection © 2018 Condé Nast. It's worth noting that it can take some time to get to the pan where you're comfortable dating in the wild with herpes: Ellie found that dating European men, who in her experience are less burdened by cultural baggage around herpes, helped her regain her confidence. Its the fact that you can get it on your lip and your genitals yeah, I know, also on your finger or in your eye and possibly progress to your brain, but for the most part, lips and naughty bits.
